KC

Kansas City Missouri.  What's going on here?   Is there something I am missing?  My family and I went there for a Ben Harper concert this past weekend.   It took place at Crossroads Grinder.  For me, this was a terrible venue, but it was an excellent concert.  Ben Harper and his warm-up group, the Revolution were superb.  Ben Harper, Ben Harper, Ben Harper...what can I say, except Genius.

Kansas City, on the other hand, appears to be a big plantation city.  The downtown is completely devoid of black folk.  I felt lonely.  I am sixty-six years old and I felt lonely for my people in Kansas City Missouri.  I am shocked at the way downtown KC has restructured itself to be urban white.  The Negroes who work in the city are slow moving and placid.  I stayed at the Hyatt Regency.  They screwed up my room reservations.  I was pissed, but I conformed.  The guests and staff were nice enough. 

When my family and I visited Crown Center, we saw a miniscule of black sisters and brothers.  I was frankly, appalled.  The shopkeepers were mostly okay, even though my family and I were followed by security when we shopped in the Crayola store.  The sales people there were nervous and seemed uncertain when I wanted to exchange a pack of crayons for a larger more expensive pack of crayons.  My granddaughter who is almost two,  still needs the jumbo size of crayon.  I found a sixteen count crayon in jumbo and skylight colors.  Boy was I excited.  I have never landed upon this many jumbo crayons and in a great colors, too.  I called out to my husband to wait, but he had already checked out.  I hurried to the checkout counter and pulled out my money to purchase the sixteen count crayons.  My husband, who is a cheapskate by nature, asked the saleslady if he could exchange the regular eight pack that he had just purchased, along with some very nice coloring and activity books.  The saleslady appeared confused and turned to ask, who I guessed was her supervisor.  It was then that I noticed the security guard, looking fierce and ready to draw what I then saw was his gun.  I could have cried. I told the dumb clerk that it was okay and that I would pay for the new found crayons separately.  It was no need to void a ticket and retrace the transaction.  The smugly stupid supervisor smiled and the guard relaxed.  All of us smiled and somehow as if in a conspiracy, we made my thrifty husband the fool.  I wanted to protest, but could not muster up the strength.  After all, I was on a weekend vacation.  I wanted a time-out too.  America, I am so tired of you.  I am so embarrassed too.  I turned immediately into a complacent slave. I did not want to cause trouble.  I'll go to my grave regretting this. 

Kansas City Missouri did this to me, again. Why?  Why are there no black people in downtown Kansas City Missouri?   Why did Crossroads want to check my purse twice?  Why were we not told to go to another  line to enter the concert after it was determined that we had all the right credentials?   The white folk just ahead of us were told.  We evidently were invisible.  How insulting! Why was I, a sixty-six year old black lady, asked to provide identification showing proof of drinking age? Things are strange in Kansas City Missouri.  The black folk have given up on their city.  They even walk and act like it.  They do walk and act slowly.  They might as well shuffle.

Obsolete

Many people my age have automatically become out of date.  Most everyone uses at least one form of modern technology, if no more than a cell phone, but many seniors are still getting left behind.  Many look and sound too proud as they say, " I don't even know how to turn it on", when asked about their knowledge of, or use of the computer.  I am sixty-six years old and am so grateful that I have tried my best to keep  up with computer dynamics.  I have not yet mastered many other forms of technological communication devices or games, but I have strived to maintain at least a working knowledge of the computer as it has advanced through the ages.  I am no great technician, but I at least know where to get computer help.  I know at least enough to ask the right questions and give the correct answers when asked something vital to proper repair.  Gifted technicians ease this information from those of us who are trying our best to work with them.

I had such a wonderful experience this past weekend with AT&T technical help.  I thought I'd write to other old geezers like me who don't think that computer literacy is important.  It is.  Watch how it is creeping up (knocking the heck out of ) on us.  Almost every transaction we make asks for an e-mail address.  If we can't provide one, we are usually directed to a very circuitous route which leaves us far more frustrated than pleased.  We cannot get left behind.  Those of us who are still pretty much in our right minds have to continue learning everything we can, daily, especially for the sake of our financial obligations.  We have to become and stay computer literate.

Love,
Eva

Nothing you can do

Sometimes, no matter what you do, life is hard.  These past few weeks have been almost hellish.  Nothing I do turns out right.  There have been too many things that have been totally out of my control.  What the heck?  Oh well, this too shall pass.

The weather is not even cooperating.

Believe it or not, I just almost lost this post.  I had to log out, then in, then accidentally found a tab that allowed me access to this draft.  Wow!  I'm going to bed with the eternal hope that tomorrow will be so much better.  I'd settle for just a tiny bit better.  Love You, God.

Satistifaction

What does it mean to be satisfied?  I certainly don't know.  Yet I know many people who seem to know.  They tell me that they are happy.  They tell me that they are successful.  They tell me that their love life is really good.  I, of course, wonder.  Satisfaction is transient.  It is evasive.  How is it that they capture this essence ?  For sure, how do they seemingly, with their answers, capture satisfaction or happiness forever.  They are Liars.

Quiet Time

There's a lot to be said for solitude.  It gives me the chance to think about things.  All things.  I think about the good, the bad and yes, the ugly.  This way, I allow myself to see points of view that in haste, I may have missed.    Many times, I do say that I wish I could revisit this or that decision.  Fortunately time has moved on and it isn't a darn thing that can be done about what has passed.  The now is where I come back to with a more centered, more focused outlook on my wonderful life.

What's Going On?

What the heck is going on?  My bank had an outage yesterday.  I couldn't pay my bills.  The last thing I need is to be late with the bills I have.  Is there a conspiracy against me?  I don't mean to sound crazy, but what the heck?  I have the money to pay, but the bank shuts down.  Oh well.

There is a change coming.  I can feel it.  I am determined to remain positive.  Things will work out okay.  God is still in charge.  I still have more blessings than anything else.  I am still loved by my family and friends and I still love them.  What more can I ask? 

Hope all of you are having an okay time.

Broke and Sad

What the heck is going on?  The older I get the less money I have.  Why is my social security being taxed?  Wasn't this taxed once?  Maybe I am confused.  My pension does not keep up with the cost of living.  My utilities are steady going up.  My funds are not.  Why can't someone come up with extra money for senior citizens?  I am still paying for able bodied people who have decided to make welfare a way of life.  I know, because there are several bums in my own family.  Shouldn't there be an additional income for those of us seniors who need a little help?  I am really pissed off, but more than that, I'm sad and broke.